I hope this email finds you doing well.
I was hoping you could fwd. this to Jim, in hopes that maybe even some
of my information would be useful to him (or anyone else). If nothing
else, I wanted him to know I believe him, and am truly sorry for all
that he's encountered.
Thank you for sharing all that's happened to you with Martin and the
rest of us. You present yourself as a completely rational, objective,
and scientific person. I don't know if my email will be at all helpful,
so if not, please feel free to chuck it.
Two experiences to share with you. One involved mantises, and another
experience, from my childhood, which you will read later on below...
Earlier this year I had an extremely vivid dream, unlike anything else
I've ever experienced. It sounds crazy, but it was even clearer than my
usual waking life. The part I thought you may be interested in involved
giant mantises; however these ones were, although intimidating in size,
I was standing in a field, when appeared a giant mantis with 4 or 5
other mantises standing on either side of him, all of them staring at
me. The one standing in the center, closest to me, waved his giant arm
at them, and told me, in my mind, "These are your ancestors, and your
descendants". As I looked back at him, he was now looking quite dashing
in a tux with tails, then he bowed to me, put his long, spiky arm on my
shoulder, and I woke up.
I laughed when I read your account about "them" adding cheesy
misinformation, as it reminded me of the Tux part of my dream.
Also, in the beginning part of the dream, I saw rows and rows
(thousands) of beautiful brown moths, walking stoically down a tree
trunk, and as they passed a certain point, faded from their beautiful
caramel hue to a dull, deathly grey. A male voice said, "This is the
cycle of life. They know all things die, and accept that truth." I know.
"New-Agey" crap, but the emotion the scene carried with it was instead a
deep sense of ennui, not acceptance at all. I felt like I was being lied
One more thing and then I promise I'm done: as a child, I had had an
experience in my bedroom in the middle of the night. I awoke from a deep
sleep, suddenly in a panic, and even though the house was pitch black
inside, I saw a tall, faceless, cloaked figure in the hallway, blacker
than the blackness around it. Even though it had no features, I knew it
was staring at me with absolute malice. I hid under the covers, and
despite my utter terror, immediately fell asleep. I awoke again sometime
later, again in a panic, except now the thing was in my doorway. Perhaps
as a primal survival instinct, my fear turned to rage, and I shouted to
it, in my head, "You don't exist!", and again, fell into
unconsciousness. I never saw the thing again, however I did have one
very painful dream involving a long "extracting" needle. I'll never
forget the dream, nor the pain.
The thing about the shadow experience I never understood was how I could
immediately fall fast asleep when I was so utterly terrified, to the
point of being nearly petrified with fear. No way should I have been
able to just drift off to sleep after that!
Anyway, thank you for taking the time to read this. If you do reply,
please delete my stuff first. Thanks.
P.S. The incident I experienced as a
child was in Santa Clarita, California, and my dream (or whatever it
was) occurred while living in Orange County, Ca.
Martin J., UFOBC: What was your gut
feeling about the beings? Basically good, bad, something in between?
What made you feel like you were being lied to?
My feeling about the beings was they
weren't malicious, but rather, almost emotionally "void". The feeling of
being lied to regarding the moths ("death") came from the fact that the
statement about the unavoidability of death (we all march toward it) was
so dispassionate, while the scene itself was SO emotionally charged.
It's like they have no feelings whatsoever, even regarding death, so
their explanation, as well-intended as it may seem, lacks any comfort at
all. As a result, it "doesn't feel right", the way a lie doesn't feel
right. I hope I'm making sense.